Last Saturday night my Grandmother passed away. Anyone who really knows me, knows how much my Grandmother meant to me and what a big part of my life she was. I had a really special relationship with my Grandmother and I only hope that others can experience a bond like that in their lives. Needless to say it has been a pretty tough time recently and like anyone who loses someone close, all I really want is just a little more time with her. I guess now she is always with me, but our relationship was so interactive. I do not know what I will do not being pummeled with questions, being offered every item she has in her fridge, or having kind suggestions mentioned over and over again (no, you aren't nagging Gram, just suggesting).
She was an incredible woman. Sharp as a tack right up until the end. One of the hardest things that I have been dealing with was that she was doing so well recently that her passing was really quite sudden. I guess I have these grandchild fantasies but I really thought she had another 5, 10, maybe 15 years in her. She had lead a wonderfully rich life, full of love, and in a lot of respects and it almost seemed as if she had sort of just chosen her time to go. The last few months have really been an exciting time for her as she attended both of my weddings, got to see all of her boys at the second wedding, meet Eva's parents, brother, and brother's girlfriend, we had just had a really pleasant Thanksgiving with the girls, she had been dropped in on by her nephew Rick a couple weeks ago, visited by her Granddaughter Lora a week ago, not to mention visits by her boyfriend Harry as well as her other Leisure World friends. It was almost as if she had sort of seen everyone she wanted to see and it was just a good time to go. She was just at peace with the world.
This was the crew from the first wedding. One good description of my Grandmother, which I think is captured pretty well in this photo, would be that she was the biggest little woman I knew.
Here we all are at Thanksgiving. There are a few "funny" photos with the same group, but I think that there might be some sort of family privilege to see my Grandmother with her tongue sticking out.
This was taken a few years ago when we were all up in Portland for Thanksgiving. She was always so happy when her boys were together.
Her spirit and vigor certainly made her larger than life in my mind. She was just so curious about the world and if there was one way to describe my Grandmother, it would be engaging. She could really have a conversation with anyone and was always asking questions. She always had to know the business. Her mind would just move so fast and often she would be onto the next question before you had finished answering the last. Her memory was pretty amazing as well. She kept birthdays in her head and would continue conversations with my buddies that might have been started 2 months earlier.
Her home was always open to anyone and the love there was ever present. I would always just bring buddies over as we were on our way surfing or if I needed a shower and between the M&Ms and my grandmother's disposition, they always had a good time. I think I would be hesitant to be left alone with a 93 year old as her grandchild went off and showered, but somehow she always made my friends feel comfortable.
She passed in a remarkably peaceful fashion. About a week and a half ago, she had fallen in her house and had bruised her ribs just a bit. She had been having a little trouble breathing but was doing really well. Still moving around her house, eating fine, and just doing her usual thing. On Saturday morning, she was having a little more trouble breathing, my dad came over, and called the 24 hour nurse. They set her up on Oxygen and got her situated in her chair and just tried to make her as comfortable as possible. Just to show how together she was right up to the end, when my father got back from playing his soccer game sort of mid-day on Saturday, the first three questions out of my Grandmother's mouth were 1. Did you score? 2. Did you guys win? 3. Was Larry Geiss there (my Grandmothers eye doctor)? My parents stayed with her most of the day, my father shared some soup with her, and when they left for my father's soccer team party she was just sleeping there in her chair. He gave her a kiss on the forehead, told her he loved her, and was off. About 10 minutes later, Anna, a wonderful woman who has been helping my and staying with my Grandmother recently, called and had said she just stopped breathing. She went as I would imagine she would have like to go, just sleeping in her chair. No pain, no suffering. One of her greatest fears was losing her marbles and she never did. She dreaded nursing homes and really was just very lucky to go out on her terms.
On Sunday, Eva and I went down and spent time with my folks in San Pedro. We all eventually made our way over to my Grandmother's house to just take care of a few things. It was pretty hard being in her house with out her. I just kept wanted to be asked about how things are going or be updated on the family business. It just was not the same without her. We decided to go for a little dinner and ended up at one of her favorite places, Hoff's Hut. About 2 weeks ago, my father had taken my Grandma and Harry out to Hoff's and wouldn't you know, they sat us at the exact same table. My Grandma loved hot fudge sundaes so my father ordered one for dinner and we all helped out.
I would just like to say thanks to everyone who has made my Grandmother's life so wonderful over the years. Each and everyone of you who touched her life is a really special person and I truly appreciate the love that you all so generously shared with my Grandmother. She was a wonderful role model for me growing up and I can only hope to reflect the spirit, vitality, courage, fiestyness, sharpness, curiosity, genuine interest in others, love, and hope she possessed, in my life. I know that she will be looking down on each and everyone of you that she loved and will be helping you with what ever obstacles that are in front of you. I know that she will be helping me in my current struggle.
If there were some last words I would like to have said to my Grandmother before she passed, they would have been the same as the words I left her with on Thanksgiving night, "Ohh Gram, I just love you so much."
-TN
She was an incredible woman. Sharp as a tack right up until the end. One of the hardest things that I have been dealing with was that she was doing so well recently that her passing was really quite sudden. I guess I have these grandchild fantasies but I really thought she had another 5, 10, maybe 15 years in her. She had lead a wonderfully rich life, full of love, and in a lot of respects and it almost seemed as if she had sort of just chosen her time to go. The last few months have really been an exciting time for her as she attended both of my weddings, got to see all of her boys at the second wedding, meet Eva's parents, brother, and brother's girlfriend, we had just had a really pleasant Thanksgiving with the girls, she had been dropped in on by her nephew Rick a couple weeks ago, visited by her Granddaughter Lora a week ago, not to mention visits by her boyfriend Harry as well as her other Leisure World friends. It was almost as if she had sort of seen everyone she wanted to see and it was just a good time to go. She was just at peace with the world.
This was the crew from the first wedding. One good description of my Grandmother, which I think is captured pretty well in this photo, would be that she was the biggest little woman I knew.
Here we all are at Thanksgiving. There are a few "funny" photos with the same group, but I think that there might be some sort of family privilege to see my Grandmother with her tongue sticking out.This was taken a few years ago when we were all up in Portland for Thanksgiving. She was always so happy when her boys were together.
Her spirit and vigor certainly made her larger than life in my mind. She was just so curious about the world and if there was one way to describe my Grandmother, it would be engaging. She could really have a conversation with anyone and was always asking questions. She always had to know the business. Her mind would just move so fast and often she would be onto the next question before you had finished answering the last. Her memory was pretty amazing as well. She kept birthdays in her head and would continue conversations with my buddies that might have been started 2 months earlier.Her home was always open to anyone and the love there was ever present. I would always just bring buddies over as we were on our way surfing or if I needed a shower and between the M&Ms and my grandmother's disposition, they always had a good time. I think I would be hesitant to be left alone with a 93 year old as her grandchild went off and showered, but somehow she always made my friends feel comfortable.
She passed in a remarkably peaceful fashion. About a week and a half ago, she had fallen in her house and had bruised her ribs just a bit. She had been having a little trouble breathing but was doing really well. Still moving around her house, eating fine, and just doing her usual thing. On Saturday morning, she was having a little more trouble breathing, my dad came over, and called the 24 hour nurse. They set her up on Oxygen and got her situated in her chair and just tried to make her as comfortable as possible. Just to show how together she was right up to the end, when my father got back from playing his soccer game sort of mid-day on Saturday, the first three questions out of my Grandmother's mouth were 1. Did you score? 2. Did you guys win? 3. Was Larry Geiss there (my Grandmothers eye doctor)? My parents stayed with her most of the day, my father shared some soup with her, and when they left for my father's soccer team party she was just sleeping there in her chair. He gave her a kiss on the forehead, told her he loved her, and was off. About 10 minutes later, Anna, a wonderful woman who has been helping my and staying with my Grandmother recently, called and had said she just stopped breathing. She went as I would imagine she would have like to go, just sleeping in her chair. No pain, no suffering. One of her greatest fears was losing her marbles and she never did. She dreaded nursing homes and really was just very lucky to go out on her terms.
On Sunday, Eva and I went down and spent time with my folks in San Pedro. We all eventually made our way over to my Grandmother's house to just take care of a few things. It was pretty hard being in her house with out her. I just kept wanted to be asked about how things are going or be updated on the family business. It just was not the same without her. We decided to go for a little dinner and ended up at one of her favorite places, Hoff's Hut. About 2 weeks ago, my father had taken my Grandma and Harry out to Hoff's and wouldn't you know, they sat us at the exact same table. My Grandma loved hot fudge sundaes so my father ordered one for dinner and we all helped out.
I would just like to say thanks to everyone who has made my Grandmother's life so wonderful over the years. Each and everyone of you who touched her life is a really special person and I truly appreciate the love that you all so generously shared with my Grandmother. She was a wonderful role model for me growing up and I can only hope to reflect the spirit, vitality, courage, fiestyness, sharpness, curiosity, genuine interest in others, love, and hope she possessed, in my life. I know that she will be looking down on each and everyone of you that she loved and will be helping you with what ever obstacles that are in front of you. I know that she will be helping me in my current struggle.
If there were some last words I would like to have said to my Grandmother before she passed, they would have been the same as the words I left her with on Thanksgiving night, "Ohh Gram, I just love you so much."
-TN
6 comments:
The top photo really displays your grandmother's sense of joy. She seemed to always be smiling and enjoying life. She was so positive in all aspects. I'm glad I knew her briefly.
I will miss your Grandma,too! Her sweet smile, her genuine interest in what's happening in out lives; she had a better memory that I do! I saw her 6 days before she died and she looked like a young girl. She had a sweet blush on her checks and nose like she had been outside playing. She will always be your angel, looking after you and protecting you. I think death is hardest on the ones left behind. You know she is driving your Grandpa crazy with her 20 questions! I'm really, really sorry for your loss! Nancy
How blessed you have been to have such a wonderful realtionship with your grandmother. Most of us never knew ours, or never had that kind of closeness. I use to laugh so much when you would talk about her and her boyfriend. I thought that was the cutest thing ever to have a boyfriend at 93 years old, good for her! I know you will miss her alot, but you are right, she will always be with you in heart and in soul. I am sorry for your loss, but know that she will always be watching over you.
We all miss you here at work and think about you daily. If we don't hear from you, have a Merry Xmas and may the New Year be good for us all.
Give my best to Eva and your folks,
Take care buster,
Good thought always,
Your Amiga,
Anna
Hi Tyler -
I'm so sorry to hear about your Gram. I know how much you'll miss her, but you know she'll be with you in spirit always. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Merry Christmas.
Sherry
Tyler,
I'm so sorry about your grandma !
Grandparents are so special, I still miss my grandma and it's been 25+ years. You are so lucky to have all those great memories. It's funny when those memories just pop into your head and you just smile, like she's standing right next to you. Take care of Harry for her.
Tina
Hey Tyler:
Sorry to hear about your Gram -- I loved chatting with her at the soccer games and making sure she was comfortable while Dennis was playing. I lost my Gram when I was about 20 and she is still my guardian angel. People with "greater senses" than I have, have told me many times that she is. Knowing she is with me, is heartwrming.
I am sure your Gram is for you too.
Glad you are doing well
David Walker
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